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25 June 2007 @ 01:04 pm
Maora/Maguri FanFiction! ^_^  
Yes, that's right, I finally finished my second MaxMa fanfic! Hah, I'm sorry it took me so long; I actually started writing it like 3 months ago, but when I was almost finished I got a major case of writer's block. But anyway, it's all done now! Here it is for your reading pleasure:

Title: Treasured
Author: chobi_chan
Word Count: 1,940
Rating: PG-13
Warnings: Shonen-ai (duh), but nothing bad.
Summary: (God, I suck at writing these...) Maora thinks Maguri is trying to push him out of his life, and Maora will do anything to stay in it.
A/N: 1) I was partially inspired by the song "Taisetsu" (Which means 'Treasured' in English) by Miki Fujimoto.
2) I'm sorry it took me so long to finish it, and I apoligize in advance if it's not as good as Atashi no Subete, my first Maguri/Maora fanfic.

Other, than that, I hope you all enjoy it!

Treasured


For what seems to be like the millionth time in my fifteen year old life, I look at myself in the mirror. And for what seems to be the millionth time I come to the realization that I hate myself. I hate myself for being born a guy, hate myself for never being good enough to gain Maguri's attention, hate myself for being the cross-dressing freak I am.

As I continue to insult myself, I stare. I see straight, nape length brown hair, honey colored eyes, and ivory tinted skin. And I think, maybe, just maybe, what would happen if I didn't wear make-up, if I went to school wearing the boys' uniform. Would Maguri notice me then?

Yeah, right. I throw that thought behind me, grab eyeliner and some blush and start getting ready for school.

~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~


The whole reason why I started cross-dressing in the first place was for Maguri. I thought 'Maybe, if I dress like a girl, then it wouldn’t look so weird if we ended up dating, even if we were both guys. Maybe, Maguri might love me back when he sees how much I love him, that all this was just to get a few steps closer to his heart.'

Well, you can see where that got me- Nowhere. He still hasn't realized that I love him. That idiot. How dense can one person be?; He just thought I was weird when I suddenly just started dressing like a girl. In fact, he laughed when he first saw me in girlish attire. He might as well have thrown a spear into my heart.

"Oh, c'mon, you have got to be kidding me.." He chuckled as I came up to him. "What did you do to yourself, Yoshitaka?"

"I told you, call me Maora!" I hissed under gritted teeth. I was trying to forget that name, my old name. With the new look I had acquired, 'Yoshitaka Ichinomiya' was slain and I re-christened myself 'Maora'. "And what do you mean, 'You got to be kidding me'? I did this all for you!"

Maguri just stared at me, wide eyed; then blinked, and continued to stare at me in the same fashion.

Idiot. "Don't you see?" I asked him, by this time forgetting he was an annoying idiot, but instead the love of my life. I allowed my lips to curl up into a smile. "I look like a girl now. Now we can start dating and even get married!" I curtsied, spun around, and couldn=t help but giggle, letting my fantasies get the best of me. Not only did I make myself look like a girl, I started thinking like one too.

All of a sudden I noticed Maguri looked uneasy. "What's the matter?"

"Well..." His eyes strayed away from mine. Why didn’t he want to look at me? Was I that big of an eyesore? "I don't know how to break this to you, but I don't like girls."

"What?!" I meant to register what he said in my head, but I couldn’t help snapping at him. "You...you...you...you mean...you're......?"

He smiled. "Yeah, I'm gay."

So that meant that we were fine the way we were?! I did all that for nothing?!

"You know, Yoshita-, I mean Maora, I'll consider dating you if you dress like a guy again." A big smile spread across Maguri's face, but I was too mad to notice. I turned away- I couldn't look him in the eye. My body suddenly started trembling. Finally he got the hint. "Um, Maora, are you ok?"

No, no, I wasn't ok. I couldn't help but feel like a fool in from of Maguri. I thought that all my hard work would finally pay off and Maguri would finally understand my feelings. But then he had to go and say he was gay. It wasn't his confession that hurt me; more like it was that he wanted me to change after I sacrificed so much for him. And he still didn't get it! God, he was such an.......such an..........

"IDIOT!!!!"

~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~


But even after he told me he didn't like girls, I didn't stop cross-dressing. I couldn't just give up, and I still kept telling myself 'Just a little bit longer; If I keep this up, maybe he=ll eventually understand.' So as long as I continued telling myself that, my heart was still filled with hope.

Still, part of me couldn’t help feeling discouraged. Immediately after that whole turn of events, the two of us went on bad terms. It suddenly felt like Maguri didn't want me in his life anymore. Did he think I was a freak because I started cross-dressing? And what about our childhood together; Did he all of a sudden not care about all those memories? Did he not care about me? My doubts regarding our relationship increased when Maguri met Shizumasa. He started spending more time with him than with me, and I felt like I was being replaced.

I kept gazing at him from afar whenever he was with Shizumasa, and I began to notice a change in Maguri. He would always have a certain look in his eyes whenever he saw Shizumasa. I wondered what it was until it finally hit me: The look that Maguri got in his eyes whenever he gazed at Shizumasa.......that was the same look I'd get in my eyes whenever I looked at him.

Realizing that hurt even more than when Maguri told me he was gay, when I drowned under a sea of useless efforts- I hated knowing that he loved another man almost as much as how oblivious he was about my feelings towards him. So from that day on I made a vow to myself- Wherever Maguri would go, even if it was solely to follow Shizumasa, I'd go too. When he applied to join the Student Council, so did I. I wouldn't let Maguri forget me, no matter how hard he tried.


~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~


I waste the whole day thinking about Maguri, thinking about us. I don't want him to forget me, or forget about our childhood, no matter how confusing it may have been, but I don't know what to do anymore. Maybe he really will pay more attention to me if I start wearing the boys' uniform... I open my locker to gather my things before going home when I notice a little white note tied to my lock. I unfold it and discover it's from Maguri.

I need to talk to you about our relationship. Meet me in the Hanging Garden before you go home today.

So, I'm still in his heart, I'm not as insignificant to him as I thought I was. But what does he want to talk about? My heart skips a beat just imagining what Maguri is thinking. I do what he asks and head for the Hanging Garden.

Maguri is already there by the time I arrive. He=s leaning up against the wall, eyes closed, the sun kissing his face. (God, how I wish I were the sun!) He must have good ears, because he opens his eyes when I walk into the garden. "There you are." He smiles and looks relieved, and I can't help but smile back knowing he's happy, knowing that he's happy seeing me.

"What did you want to talk about?" I try to sound as nonchalant as possible, hiding the fact that my heart is beating so fast it hurts.

He looks away, this time differently. He's not ashamed of me, he's contemplating something. I give him a minute acknowledging that. My heart skips a beat again. I wait a moment, but he still doesn’t say anything. Instead, he turns to me, and looks at me and only me with those beautiful, golden eyes of his.

“W-what is it?” I can’t help but ask, trying to suppress the heat rising in my cheeks and my escalating heartbeat. Suddenly Maguri wraps his arms around me, embracing me tightly. His arms feel strong and warm against my body; Just knowing he’s holding me makes me feel weak.

“M-Maguri, what are you doing?!” I try to push away but that only urges him to hold me tighter. He puts his hand behind my head and holds me up against him. My cheeks feel like they’re going to explode.

“I don’t want you to leave me.” He says. “I don’t want you to run away. It seems like that’s all you do lately.”

“What are you talking about?” I say, suddenly taken aback. I can feel his body trembling against mine. I try to look up at him. I see so many expressions on his face – confusion, desire, sadness. Just looking at him makes me want to cry. What is it, Maguri? What are you trying to tell me?

He inhales. “You’ve been avoiding me.”

What? Suddenly I find the strength to push him back. “What are you talking about?! You’re the one who’s been avoiding me! You’re the one who always runs away!” What a jerk; I can’t believe him! He’s the one who started getting distant, who started hanging around Shizumasa. Now he goes and tells me that I left him behind?!

He blinks, confused, reverting back to him stupid, dumb blonde usual self. “Maora, what are you talking about? I never…”

I grit my teeth; I can’t take it anymore. How does he not see what’s really going on between us? “Yes, it was all your fault! Ever since that day when I told you I was going to start dressing like a girl, you pushed me away. I did all that, I changed myself to be close to you, and you just shoved all it all back in my face! I was a burden, an utter embarrassment to you, and that’s why you pushed me away and replaced me with Shizumasa...” By this time my anger dissipates and hot, stinging tears stream down my face. “That’s it...right...?” I shut my eyes tight; trying to look at Maguri now is unbearable. “It’s...it’s your fault that I’m like this…” I start to feel my body tremble and I take a deep breath in. The tears won’t stop rolling down my cheeks. Before I can go wipe them away I feel Maguri’s slender finger brush underneath my eyes.

“I’m sorry.” He says. I can’t look at his face, but I can tell by his tone that he earnestly means it. I hear him take a step closer, then his arms wrap around me once again. He rests his head on my shoulder and I bury my face in his chest; somehow, this is somewhat relief for the both of us.

“I’m so sorry.” Maguri goes on. “I never meant to hurt you like that.” He looks down at me and lifts my chin up, forcing me to look in those gorgeous golden eyes of his. “And stop thinking that I forgot about you, because I never can. I’ve known you forever Maora; you’re engraved in my heart and nothing, nobody, can take you away. Understand?”

I nod, turning from him for only a spilt second to wipe my eyes. So, even Maguri treasures our childhood together...he really does treasure me...

“Hey, how about we walk home together?” Before I can respond, Maguri’s fingers lace through mine. My heart beat escalades and my entire body grows warm. He smiles a sweet, tender smile, telling me that it’s ok, that I’m his.

I allow my lips to curl up into a smile as well, and I tighten my grip on him; holding him past, present, and future. “Yeah, let’s go.”

Posted to shinshi_doumei & mama_sdc
 
 
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Current Mood: chipperchipper
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Glückskeks: awwles_lenne on June 25th, 2007 06:26 pm (UTC)
Actually, I loved it! There were some things I'd change (for example, you exaggerate the period a bit), but overall -- it's just the perfect fluff fic. Some may find it ridiculously sweet, but it's exactly my taste. XDD
At times, you need pure fluff. And it was sad as well, so I don't see any problem there. I very much felt for Maora which is quite strange as his behavior is a bit weird, after all. The whole situation reminds me of the book I'm currently reading. I don't know if it's published anywhere else than Germany, but it's called "how real is reality?" and one of the topics is that people use to talk about the same thing but everyone on a totally different layer, so no one understands the other one and they end up fighting. Well. Anyway.
Aside from "......." and some occasional "=" (which I believe is either a typo or the failure of LJ/Word) I can't say anything bad about this fic. =)
ちょび: Chibi Maorachobi_chan on June 25th, 2007 08:22 pm (UTC)
Hehehe yeah I'm sorry about the random "="; When I copied and pasted the fic for some odd reason all the quotation marks and apostrophies got changed into either A, @, or =. I thought I fixed all of them, but I guess I missed a few [>_<] Gomen! But thanks so much for pointing it out! ^^
Heheh yeah I'm a sucker for agnst and shonen ai fluff, and I just love writing through Maora's perpective. For some reason I can relate to him alot; That, and Maora and Maguri deserve there own fanfics, so basically I'm just corrupting the Internet with their shonen ai goodness ^_^ lol
That book your reading sounds really interesting. That cenario kind of reminds me of the Tower of Babel. **makes note to self: must see if that book is out in the United States**
Hehe but back to the fic: Thank you so much for reading it and I'm so glad you enjoyed it =}
Glückskeks: friendsles_lenne on June 25th, 2007 08:38 pm (UTC)
Yeah, thought so. It's not like this hasn't happened to anyone before. XD"

Yep; I guess I'd have problems to show Maora's feelings in a believable way, because as much as I do understand him in your fic and the actual manga, I think I can't really create such intense feelings over this sort of reason myself. Hmm.
Whatsoever, you should write more MaMa!! <3

It's by Paul Watzlawick (who died this march T_T), btw. =]
ちょび: Maorachobi_chan on June 25th, 2007 09:27 pm (UTC)
I blame Word Perfect; I typed about half of the fic on their, then finished it on my my newly installed Microsoft Word 2003. The first part that I typed with Word Perfect is what got messed up [>_<]

The one character I have problems with is Maguri; It's his fault I had writer's block. To me, he's the kind of character you have to watch for when it comes to dialogue. Since he doesn't tend to express his feelings (about Maora) that much, and since Tanemura portrays him as an idiot, I keep questioning myself whenever it's his time to speak: Will this make him sound too out of character? Would he even say something like this? Haha but despite all of the hardships he gives me, I still love him ^_^
And yes, I am definitely going to write more MaMa! <3 The next thing I'd like to do is an NC 17 fic... Bad, bad Chobi ^^

Man, I hate it when you find out an author dies just when you start reading their work T_T Oh, but is this the book you happen to be talking about?
Glückskeks: shoujoles_lenne on June 26th, 2007 08:29 am (UTC)
I must admit, it's a bit of a no-go for me if authors write a character as "just the idiot", but it's even sadder when the fandom takes it over (like they did, for example, with Taichi Yagami from Digimon -- hey, he's not stupid and fugly; I wonder if they just skipped the few episodes where we saw him being earnest, because there are episodes with him being earnest ... that doesn't count for every "idiot character", like Maguri -- I really can't remember a scene where he's been really, really earnest). I hope Arina will show is a less idiotic, easy-going side of Maguri soon. He's such a sweet character, it'd be sad if she wouldn't show us more about his softer self.

Yeees! That's the book I meant!! =D
ちょび: Hainechobi_chan on June 26th, 2007 11:28 pm (UTC)
Oh yes, I agree. Characters created for the sole purpose of comic relief do get annoying and seem to be out-of-place after a while if that's all the author is willing to portray them as. But, I think after this whole arc with Haine's past and her parents clear up, Arina will go back to showing the relationships of the other characters. She did so with Full Moon, I think she'll do it with SDC. Hm, yes, but I wouldn't worry about Maguri acting like an idiot for the rest of the series -- I think he'll start showing his emotional side towards Maora soon (Like in Chapter 30....I need more MaMa love like that! <3}

Oh awesome! I'm going to check every bookstore until I find that book now ^^
.riboN: kiss maxmavalicch on May 16th, 2008 01:37 pm (UTC)
nyah♥ :3 sweet♥
Maguri it's dense... e_e; dreadfully dense.. poor maora..
magucchi, wake up! O-O *slapped maguri*

(God, how I wish I were the sun!)
LOL. maora the best BD